I’m as shocked as the next person on the apparent facts around the Tiger Woods infidelity. Yes, I’m shocked at Tiger, but I’m also shocked at the public’s perception of guilt, and how they’re coming down on the guy. You would have had to been in a coma if you missed the rantings and vicious rhetoric from the male and female talking heads on T.V. , radio and the press.
They’re not quite calling for his “head” but what they’re all saying is he deserves to be hurt financially by his “transgressions”. This raised an interesting thought….and I would love to hear the response to my question from the same shrill voices calling for his heart being pulled out through his wallet. What if the roles were reversed?
What if his very attractive wife had an affair? Here’s this young vivacious woman, alone for great periods of time, with access to Nanny’s, what if she had some “transgressions”? Perhaps public opinion would change, although I’m sure there will still be those blaming Tiger for her “cheating”, but more to the point, lets talk about the law.
Hang on to your seat for this one. If Elin cheated, it wouldn’t make a difference in her ability to claim child support, spousal support, and the stated prenuptial amount in property division. She would get the same amount. You think the same talking heads, the same outraged callers, the same talk show hosts would be screaming about how unfair it would be for Tiger to have to pay out to a cheating wife? This is the reality folks.
What if Tiger had acted like his wife did and taken a golf club to her? Let me answer this for you. Tiger would have been taken to jail in handcuffs and ankle chains, fingerprinted, and charged with assault, and locked up. Even if Elin didn’t press charges, some Florida prosecutor would have gotten on his high horse and pontificated about men abusing their wives and pressed charges.
Let’s follow the money in this episode. Tiger had a prenuptial agreement which limited his property distribution to his wife in the event of separation. Our understanding is, she is demanding that for her to stay in the marriage, she wants to renegotiate the prenuptial agreement. I’m sorry, it’s hard for me to not be cynical about this. To me this sounds like a prostitute that says “if you want me to spend the whole night, it’s going to cost you more”. Not exactly the same but close enough for me to see the parallel.
I would have had respect for the lady had she done one of two things. Either just leave the marriage, or not have “demanded” more money in the form of a ultimatum to Tiger. Anything else is either blackmail, gold digging, prostitution, or extortion. Take your pick. This is not what honest spouses do in a loving relationship. Yet public opinion and the media seem to be shouting from the roof tops……….”you go girl”……….”take him to the cleaners”………….”you deserve it, because he’s a dog”.
I honestly don’t know which is worse, cheating or extortion! I know what the female talking heads are going to say. “She’s only extorting because he was cheating. Somehow if the “y” chromosome is involved, it’s his fault any way you slice it, whether it be in a court of law or in the court of public opinion.
What we don’t know is anything about their marriage. Is cheating ever justified? If a woman cheats is it justified? For all we know, they may have been living a sexless marriage. Is it okay to cheat if you’re living in a sexless marriage? Was she “hucking” and nagging him to the point where they couldn’t be in the same bed together? Would this have made a difference?
In our Gold Digger nation, none of the above makes any difference, including who cheated on who. Tiger pays, and he pays a lot, regardless of what happened, what lead to what, or how things came about.
The other thing we know is the numbers being thrown around. We heard numbers like 80 million dollars for another two years added on to the prenuptial agreement. In our Gold Digger Nation, this might make sense for Tiger. Yes, the payout based on child support guidelines, whether the prenuptial should be thrown out or not, spousal support, might just add up to 40 million per annum. 80 million might just be a better deal for Tiger than having to deal with the family law courts and their outrageous wealth transfers.
Which leads me to my next section, why did Tiger get married? I believe Tiger got married for all the right reasons except for what was right for him. I believe he felt society expected him to get married, his parents would want him to get married, and it seemed like everyone else was either getting married or was married. This is a very common scenario for men of his age.
In reality, Tiger found out that “marriage” was not for him. It certainly looked like a great match, the Swedish model/nanny and the world’s best golfer. The reality, the marriage didn’t work or either one of them shouldn’t have married.
My advice to Tiger, although he’s not asking for it, I would end the marriage. The reality is that you knew it was a mistake a while ago. It’s not going to get better, it’s going to get worse. You clearly enjoy women and I mean to emphasize the plurality of the word. She’ll never trust you and you’ll be paying for your “transgressions”for eternity.
The reality is she’s just figuring out the best time to leave you anyways. Bottom line, you won’t be happy at all. You’re going to pay regardless, the question is going to be how much. Fortunately for you, you can make this up in no time. Most guys don’t have the opportunity to pick themselves off the proverbial “mat”.
Tiger, I’m still your fan. It’s none of our business what happened in your marriage. It takes two to tango as they say. You’ve been portrayed as an incredible dog of a villain, and your wife is the helpless little victim. Nothing is going to change that. That’s what living in a Gold Digger Nation means. To them I say, #$%$%^^& you!
My advice, keep on smacking that white ball, end your marriage, and party like it’s 2099!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
A SHOCKING STATISTIC
A recent report by the Vanier Institute of Marriage, reported that high school students, when surveyed, are anticipating marriage by a 9 to 1 margin, or 90%. The report goes on to say that this percentage is exactly the same when students were asked the same question in the 50’s, or two generations ago.
This statistic floored me. All the information that we think they have, that they have witnessed and gone through as part of the divorce industry statistics, and still there is this type of desire to tie the knot. Amazing! In a way, it supported my claim that teenagers need to get the message that I wrote in the book. It solidified my belief that the information of what it’s like to live in a Gold Digger Nation is simply not being communicated. We have to do a better job of laying out the facts, explaining the potential consequences, and do so in an informative setting , not by lecturing to them or scolding them but rather than by informing them.
Whether it be a son or a daughter, every parent has a responsibility to inform their children and everyone’s children about the dangers and tribulations of marriage in a Gold Digger Nation. It is not a personal opinion like being a liberal or a conservative. Rather, it’s similar to explaining the birds and the bees to younger children, so they have a basis for what lies ahead. To not inform, is to allow our uninformed youth to potentially face a lifetime of misery and servitude, even though they did nothing wrong. Like the vast majority of people today, they won’t know what hit them until it’s too late. It’s not only in a divorce scenario that this may happen. Rather, it effects marriage right from the “get-go”.
Ninety percent is exactly the same percentage as the Fifties. Wouldn’t we be alarmed if the same percentage of teens today were asked if they planned on smoking cigarettes as their counterparts in the fifties? With everything we know now, it is mind boggling to drive by a high school and see teenagers outside smoking. This is how I see the comparison.
It confirms my belief that teenagers are not getting the information about the realities and consequences of marriage in today’s society from their families, schools, peers, media, or anywhere for that matter. It is for this reason, I’m so glad I wrote the book, Gold Digger Nation. It is specifically this generation that I’m hoping to communicate with. Chances are, they won’t have the understanding to pick up this book and read it. This is why it is so important for you to communicate the importance to them of reading the book. The marriage, no marriage decision may be more important than what profession they will choose as a career. I’m sure you’ve spoken to them about that subject.!
A recent report by the Vanier Institute of Marriage, reported that high school students, when surveyed, are anticipating marriage by a 9 to 1 margin, or 90%. The report goes on to say that this percentage is exactly the same when students were asked the same question in the 50’s, or two generations ago.
This statistic floored me. All the information that we think they have, that they have witnessed and gone through as part of the divorce industry statistics, and still there is this type of desire to tie the knot. Amazing! In a way, it supported my claim that teenagers need to get the message that I wrote in the book. It solidified my belief that the information of what it’s like to live in a Gold Digger Nation is simply not being communicated. We have to do a better job of laying out the facts, explaining the potential consequences, and do so in an informative setting , not by lecturing to them or scolding them but rather than by informing them.
Whether it be a son or a daughter, every parent has a responsibility to inform their children and everyone’s children about the dangers and tribulations of marriage in a Gold Digger Nation. It is not a personal opinion like being a liberal or a conservative. Rather, it’s similar to explaining the birds and the bees to younger children, so they have a basis for what lies ahead. To not inform, is to allow our uninformed youth to potentially face a lifetime of misery and servitude, even though they did nothing wrong. Like the vast majority of people today, they won’t know what hit them until it’s too late. It’s not only in a divorce scenario that this may happen. Rather, it effects marriage right from the “get-go”.
Ninety percent is exactly the same percentage as the Fifties. Wouldn’t we be alarmed if the same percentage of teens today were asked if they planned on smoking cigarettes as their counterparts in the fifties? With everything we know now, it is mind boggling to drive by a high school and see teenagers outside smoking. This is how I see the comparison.
It confirms my belief that teenagers are not getting the information about the realities and consequences of marriage in today’s society from their families, schools, peers, media, or anywhere for that matter. It is for this reason, I’m so glad I wrote the book, Gold Digger Nation. It is specifically this generation that I’m hoping to communicate with. Chances are, they won’t have the understanding to pick up this book and read it. This is why it is so important for you to communicate the importance to them of reading the book. The marriage, no marriage decision may be more important than what profession they will choose as a career. I’m sure you’ve spoken to them about that subject.!
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Gold Digger Defined 2010
There's lots of labeling going around these days concerning the term "gold digger". It seems to range from paying for dinner entitlement, all the way up to multi million dollar divorce awards. I believe this label is too general and that it needs to be broken down into sub-labels for clarification purposes.
The gal or guy that is out for a free dinner and perhaps the perks of trips to Vegas and Hawaii, is what I would label Gold Digging "Light". This is very similar to prostitution with no money being exchanged but rather goods and services instead. If he or she gives you a thousand for a new outfit(s), that's just Gold Digging. If you receive a thousand with no stipulation, that's prostitution. You see how fine the line is?
To go one step further, if you really like the guy and accept all these "gifts", it's still gold digging. If you accept the cash and really like the guy as well, it's still prostitution. But we're splitting hairs here. If the only reciprocity is sex/companionship for the gifts, trips, dinners, and shows, that's a very fine line between prostitution and gold digging.
The above is minimal on the Gold Digger scale. In fact it's so common place in 2010, that it's considered acceptable and down right expected in our Gold Digger Nation.
Now let's look at "Major League Gold Digging". We're not talking minor league stuff like jewellery, dinners, trips, and gifts. Rather, we're now discussing houses, assets, furnishings, monies, and annuities. This major league Gold Digging is also known as divorce!
Regardless of intentions going into the marriage, one thing is for sure, one of you will end up a gold digger, and the other will end up the dupe. That's the way the system is set up. The question which remains is how much?
You see, it's all been taken care of for you. The biggest Gold Digger is the 800 pound Gorilla, known as our Family Law System, that has been turned into a court of redistribution. It redistributes children, monies, assets, and power. The court and the court jesters...the judges, the lawyers, the forensic accountants, the psychologists, are the diggers. They do the work and you get the gold. Needless to say, not only is this legal in our family courts, but society has accepted this as the norm.
Major League Gold Digging requires either a marriage and or cohabitation for a specific period of time. Once this is in place, you can cheat, abuse, contribute nothing, steal, and even abscond with the children, and none of the above will affect your Gold Digger award and status. You must be wondering now, how do I protect myself from the Gold Digger laws?. Given the choice between major League Gold Digging and Gold Digging light, choose the latter. That's the only way to protect yourself. Also, wear a condom!
The gal or guy that is out for a free dinner and perhaps the perks of trips to Vegas and Hawaii, is what I would label Gold Digging "Light". This is very similar to prostitution with no money being exchanged but rather goods and services instead. If he or she gives you a thousand for a new outfit(s), that's just Gold Digging. If you receive a thousand with no stipulation, that's prostitution. You see how fine the line is?
To go one step further, if you really like the guy and accept all these "gifts", it's still gold digging. If you accept the cash and really like the guy as well, it's still prostitution. But we're splitting hairs here. If the only reciprocity is sex/companionship for the gifts, trips, dinners, and shows, that's a very fine line between prostitution and gold digging.
The above is minimal on the Gold Digger scale. In fact it's so common place in 2010, that it's considered acceptable and down right expected in our Gold Digger Nation.
Now let's look at "Major League Gold Digging". We're not talking minor league stuff like jewellery, dinners, trips, and gifts. Rather, we're now discussing houses, assets, furnishings, monies, and annuities. This major league Gold Digging is also known as divorce!
Regardless of intentions going into the marriage, one thing is for sure, one of you will end up a gold digger, and the other will end up the dupe. That's the way the system is set up. The question which remains is how much?
You see, it's all been taken care of for you. The biggest Gold Digger is the 800 pound Gorilla, known as our Family Law System, that has been turned into a court of redistribution. It redistributes children, monies, assets, and power. The court and the court jesters...the judges, the lawyers, the forensic accountants, the psychologists, are the diggers. They do the work and you get the gold. Needless to say, not only is this legal in our family courts, but society has accepted this as the norm.
Major League Gold Digging requires either a marriage and or cohabitation for a specific period of time. Once this is in place, you can cheat, abuse, contribute nothing, steal, and even abscond with the children, and none of the above will affect your Gold Digger award and status. You must be wondering now, how do I protect myself from the Gold Digger laws?. Given the choice between major League Gold Digging and Gold Digging light, choose the latter. That's the only way to protect yourself. Also, wear a condom!
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